The legacy of a father
My father in law passed on a few days ago, on Friday 19 August 2016, at the age of 96. It has been a period of reflection and the memories are flowing thick and fast as people recall his quietly potent life. It has been a moving experience to listen to my husband and his siblings recount similar stories of his kindness, wisdom, generosity and humility. An understated non-conformist, he was married to one woman for 67 years in a world where faithfulness in marriage is becoming a rarity. His peaceful disposition which I witnessed in every interaction with him has marked the consciousness of every single one of his children.
The thing that has struck me the most are the testimonies of his heartfelt faith. His walk with God was disciplined, consistent and the fulcrum of his entire existence. Everything else in his life revolved around his love for God. As I listened to my husband and his sisters reminisce on how his favourite scripture was 1 Timothy 6:6, ‘But godliness with contentment is great gain’ , how he had that scripture inscribed on his bedroom door and how he made them memorise and recite it frequently, I could see how deeply that scripture had imprinted upon and reflected in the lives of all his children. This set me thinking about the power of a father’s legacy.
The impact of a father in the life of his children should never be underestimated. For many children, their father is the first hero they identify with. A godly father sets the tone of who his son wants to become and who his daughter aspires to marry. As I reflect on the fact that fathers are shaping and influencing their children daily whether they realise it or not, I would like to encourage fathers to be even more intentional about the legacy they are leaving their children.
The greatest legacy that a godly father can leave his children is the faith that he embraces. Scripture refers repeatedly to ‘the God of our fathers’ and God is frequently referred to in scripture as ‘the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob’. This is a direct result of the intentionality with which Abraham passed on his faith to Isaac, his son. Consider the conversation that transpired between Abraham and Isaac as Abraham embarked upon the journey that would lead him to the greatest test of his life as recorded in Genesis 22:5-8.
‘“Stay here with the donkey,” Abraham told the servants. “The boy and I will travel a little farther. We will worship there, and then we will come right back.”
So Abraham placed the wood for the burnt offering on Isaac’s shoulders, while he himself carried the fire and the knife. As the two of them walked on together, Isaac turned to Abraham and said, “Father?”
“Yes, my son?” Abraham replied.
“We have the fire and the wood,” the boy said, “but where is the sheep for the burnt offering?”
“God will provide a sheep for the burnt offering, my son,” Abraham answered. And they both walked on together.’
Isaac was confident to discuss the things of God with his father. From the intimate tone of the conversation, you get the feeling that this was something that regularly happened between them. Isaac witnessed the unshakable faith his father had in God and the confidence with which he assured his servants that he and Isaac would go and worship God together and return together. Abraham was fully prepared to obey God and sacrifice his son because he was fully persuaded of God’s promise that through this same son he would have many descendants. He was persuaded that God would do whatever it took to bring that word to pass, including raising Isaac from the dead, if necessary. What potent faith! I can’t help thinking about how that experience must have marked Isaac’s consciousness for life.
Faith is both taught and caught. It is the honour of a father to teach his children God’s word and how to walk with God. Even more importantly, a godly father should walk the walk, demonstrating to his children by example what it means to walk by faith, depend on God in all seasons, and live a life of consecration to God. Deuteronomy 4, 6 and 11 have similar themes as Moses, instructed the migrant Israelites about how to conduct themselves when they entered the land God had promised them. Verses 2 and 19 of Deuteronomy 11 sum up the secrets of succeeding in the Promised Land which Moses was trying to pass across.
‘Now keep this in mind: it was you, not your children, who saw and experienced firsthand all the lessons the Eternal your God taught you. You saw how He demonstrated His majesty and His overwhelming power…Teach these things to your children. Talk about them when you’re sitting together in your home and when you’re walking together down the road. Make them the last thing you talk about before you go to bed and the first thing you talk about the next morning. That way you and your children will be blessed.’
Father, you have had some experiences with God which your children have not had. Be intentional about teaching them why you believe what you believe and your lessons will ring true in their hearts because they will see in you the fruits of walking with God. Pray with them; teach them the word; don’t leave this awesome responsibility to your wife. Your greatest legacy as a father will not be the inheritance you leave your children but the faith you pass on to them.
How intentional are you about passing on your faith to your children? Be deliberate about helping your children to develop a living, breathing relationship with God.
